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Wise quotes about sex
October 27, 2018 Anniversary Wishes for Wife 4 comments

20 Inspirational Quotes About Love & Relationships Here are some inspirational quotes and phrases about love and relationships that will help to inspire you to not give up on finding that special Sex & Relationships.

As the wise Bro Henry Louis Mencken once quoted: “Life without sex might be safer, but it would be unbearably dull. It is the sex instinct which makes women seem beautiful, which they are once in a blue moon, and men seem wise and brave, which they never are at all. Throttle it, denaturalize it, take it away, and human existence would be reduced to the prosaic, laborious, boresome, imbecile level of life in an anthill.”

Are you living in an anthill?! We hope not. If so get your ass out of there and start living the life of a Bro. To get you started Quotes for Bros will freshen up your mind for the next minutes with the 32 filthiest, sexiest and dirtiest Quotes of all Time for Bros and their Girls. You dirty sexy minds. Share them with other Bros who will love this and enjoy. Not only will your mind get in going with these sexy quotes, your libido too. Who doesn’t want to drive its partner wild every time and make them want you even more.. We have the solution not only with these dirty sexy quotes, but also with this guide. Read carefully because it is only for a selected few.

Do you also want to become the master in Dirty Talk to win every girl or guy for you!? Then we recommend getting this eBook on how to talk dirty, sexy & drive your partner wild! Watch the video here and you will be amazed with the results of this course:

Click here To Learn How To Give Your Partner What They’ve ALWAYS Wanted!

Oh and do not forget rule 26: A bro will never give detail when describing a sexual encounter to another Bro. Doing so will force your bro to imagine you naked and this is unforgivable.

Also check these senior Bros out that made sure they got laid after people read their (sexy) quote in the yearbook.

The 32 Dirty Sexy Quotes for Bros of all kind

1. “Yes I have a dirty mind and you’re on it”

You’re on it, you and I making it out. Or making out..

2. “I cant taste my lips could you do it for me”

There are certain things that we can’t do by ourselves.

3. “Breakfast its the most important meal of the day”

Never EVER EVER skip your breakfast!

4. “I’ll let you play with mine”

Well, it’s just as simple as “Do unto others what you want others do unto you”

5. “A world without women would be a pain in the ass”

A world without women? Certainly is a pain on each guys ass!

6. “Nice pants can i test the zipper”

Well, you can also test what’s behind that zipper!

7. “I don’t care if you have small boobs”

Boobs are still boobs no matter what the size is. Sexy any size.

8. “That amazing moment”

Relieved!

9. “Roses are red the grass is green”

I just wanna have fun with you, in my bed.

10. “Men are a lot like infants”

And like infants, they just love to suck it!

11. “I am your one way ticket”

I’m the only who can make you out of your mind.

12. “Go ahead touch it”

And don’t just touch it, feel it.

13. “Your face look better between my legs”

If you want to always look better, always go between my legs.

14. “I wanna do bad things with you”

Bad, naughty, dirty, sexy stuffs with you.

15. “I think I could fall madly in bed with you”

Because you’re just too hot to be ignored.

16. “I’d look good on you”

And you look good on me too.

17.  “You’re in my inappropriate thoughts”

Talking about inappropriate sexy quotes, I know you get what I mean.

18. “Your clothes are making me uncomfortable please take them off”

And show me only your birthday suit.

19. “In public you are his princess”

She can only show you her dirty secrets in private, only with you.

20. “I’m in my bed you’re in your bed “

The right place is right here with me, in my bed.

21. “I’ll kiss you on the rain so you get twice as wet”

You’ll get wet outside and inside with these sexy quotes.

22. “How did the bed get that wet?”

Because we’re both too hot!

23. “Blow me”

Please? It will about to explode!

24. “Real men don’t wear pink”

And they love it so much!

25. “I enjoy a good spanking”

Sometimes, spanking is fun!

26. “Last night you were unhinged”

Do it over and over again!

27. “Kissing burns calories”

A great daily workout for everyone of us!

28. “I licked it so it’s mine”

Everything that I licked is mine, would you like a lick?

29. “Your lips look so lonely”

My lips are lonely too, they’ll be a great match!

30. “What’s the difference between being HUNGRY and being HORNY?”

Well, it can satisfy both needs!

31. “I want you inside me”

Yes, it’s hot if you’re inside me.

32. “Good sex is like good bridge “

Because hands can manipulate it.

Now keep calm and grab a cold beverage. These 32 Most Dirty Sexy Quotes of the internet will definitely bring you a lot of game the next time when you talk to a girl. And remember rule 46: The only time that cockblocking is condoned by the bro code is when the designated cockblocker (aka the bombardier) has viable reasons to stop a bro from hooking up with a girl. Warning: do not use this for coming Valentines day. These sexy quotes will probably not be appreciated.

Do not forget to check out the home of the original Dirty Talk Handbook, we’ve helped over ten thousand people learn how to talk dirty and we can help you, too!

Click here To Learn How To Give Your Partner What They’ve ALWAYS Wanted!

Do you have your own dirty quotes? Any unbelievably sexy quotes? Feel free to share it with us and we will be happy to feature it and add it up to our list of sexy quotes. Need to get ready for that sexy date? Make sure to get your male hairstyle on point, nose piercing in, your sex quotes ready and your smile on to end up with that promise ringpromise ring around your finger. Still can’t get enough of our quotes for bros? You may also enjoy our 27 Basketball Quotes for Basketball Lovers and quotes from the famous movie character Johnny Depp as Captain Jack Sparrow on 19 Jack Sparrow Quotes about Life.

Filed Under: Bro Quotes, Sexy QuotesTagged With: Dirty Quotes, love quotes, Sexy Quotes

Explore 1000 Sex Quotes by authors including Margaret Mead, Jimmy Dean, and Audrey Hepburn at With age comes wisdom and a high sex drive. And the.

Sex Quotes and Sayings

wise quotes about sex

EcoSalon’s favorite quotes celebrating sex and sexuality.

Sex. In America an obsession. In other parts of the world a fact. -Marlene Dietrich

It is not sex that gives the pleasure, but the lover. -Marge Piercy

Sex is more exciting on the screen and between the pages than between the sheets. -Andy Warhol

For women the best aphrodisiacs are words. The G-spot is in the ears. He who looks for it below there is wasting his time. -Isabel Allende

There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. -P. J. O’Rourke

I wouldn’t recommend sex, drugs or insanity for everyone, but they’ve always worked for me. -Hunter S. Thompson

Sex: the thing that takes up the least amount of time and causes the most amount of trouble. -John Barrymore

Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get the feeling that God is playing a practical joke? -Rita Rudner

Instruction in sex is as important as instruction in food; yet not only are our adolescents not taught the physiology of sex, but never warned that the strongest sexual attraction may exist between persons so incompatible in tastes and capacities that they could not endure living together for a week much less a lifetime. -George Bernard Shaw

Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go it’s pretty damn good. -Woody Allen

Sex is a part of nature. I go along with nature. -Marilyn Monroe

There is more to sex appeal than just measurements. I don’t need a bedroom to prove my womanliness. I can convey just as much sex appeal, picking apples off a tree or standing in the rain. -Audrey Hepburn

I remember the first time I had sex – I kept the receipt. -Groucho Marx

My reaction to porn films is as follows: After the first ten minutes, I want to go home and screw. After the first 20 minutes, I never want to screw again as long as I live. -Erica Jong

When a man talks dirty to a woman, it’s sexual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man, it’s $3.95 a minute. -Author Unknown

I haven’t trusted polls since I read that 62% of women had affairs during their lunch hour. I’ve never met a woman in my life who would give up lunch for sex. -Erma Bombeck

Sex education may be a good idea in the schools, but I don’t believe the kids should be given homework. -Bill Cosby

Conservatives say teaching sex education in the public schools will promote promiscuity. With our education system? If we promote promiscuity the same way we promote math or science, they’ve got nothing to worry about. -Beverly Mickins

Why should we take advice on sex from the pope? If he knows anything about it, he shouldn’t! -George Bernard Shaw

To hear many religious people talk, one would think God created the torso, head, legs and arms, but the devil slapped on the genitals. -Don Schrader

Love is the answer, but while you are waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions. -Woody Allen

A promiscuous person is a person who is getting more sex than you are. -Victor Lownes

Sex is as important as eating or drinking and we ought to allow the one appetite to be satisfied with as little restraint or false modesty as the other. -Marquis de Sade

A student undergoing a word-association test was asked why a snowstorm put him in mind of sex. He replied frankly: “because everything does.” -Honor Tracy

An intellectual is a person who’s found one thing that’s more interesting than sex. -Aldous Huxley

Anybody who believes that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach flunked geography. -Robert Byrne

Sex is emotion in motion. -Mae West

Some things are better than sex, and some are worse, but there’s nothing exactly like it. -W. C. Fields

Literature – creative literature – unconcerned with sex, is inconceivable. -Gertrude Stein

Life without sex might be safer but it would be unbearably dull. It is the sex instinct which makes women seem beautiful, which they are once in a blue moon, and men seem wise and brave, which they never are at all. Throttle it, denaturalize it, take it away, and human existence would be reduced to the prosaic, laborious, boresome, imbecile level of life in an anthill. -Henry Louis Mencken

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Images: Elena Lagaria, Stuart Conner, Valeria C Preisler

Tags:lists, quotes, sayings, Sex, sexuality
Jessica Marati

Jessica Marati currently resides in New York City and covers travel and sustainability for EcoSalon. Catch her weekly column, Behind the Label.

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75 Famous Sex Quotes from Celebs, Writers, Comics, and More

wise quotes about sex

This post is meant to complement my earlier one commemorating Valentine's Day. Entitled "Love Quotes: The Wisest, Wittiest . . . and Most Cynical," it presented what I thought were the most entertaining--and thought-provoking--quotes available on the topic. Here I attempt to achieve the same thing with the always controversial, ever-intriguing subject of sex.

To me, our culture takes the crucial matter of sex much too seriously. Which reminds me of the humorous (and richly paradoxical) quote from Oscar Wilde: "Life is much too important ever to be taken seriously." So, too, I think it is with sex--obviously of the greatest significance, yet (whether "executed" solo or with a partner) great fun as well. Even when predominantly in the service of lust, it's still a form of pleasure, of play. As such, it's both a welcome and necessary diversion from our everyday chores and obligations.

This is why witty sex quotes--especially those that beguile us into laughing at ourselves--deserve our (at least) "quasi-serious" attention. To maintain our psychological balance, it's essential we let ourselves smile, giggle, and maybe even break up over all the incongruities, inconsistencies, and flat-out contradictions related to what may be our favorite pastime.

After all, what could be healthier than light-heartedly chuckling over our abiding impulses, susceptibilities, and weaknesses? At some level, most of us can appreciate that many comic utterances betray profound truths about ourselves--truths we might not be willing to look at without their being framed humorously. But feeling amused, we may be able to recognize and (however begrudgingly) accept that, overcome by lower instincts and desires, we're quite capable of being like that, talking like that, reacting like that. Our powerful, more animal side can preempt our better judgment or our higher ethical sensibilities.

Here, for example, are two witty (but also rather cutting) examples of how our sexual propensities may disclose things about us that, though comical, are hardly admirable. The first pokes fun at men, the second at women:

"Anybody who believes that the way to a man's heart is through his stomach flunked geography." (Robert Byrne)

"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible." (P. J. O'Rourke)

Anyhow, I hope you'll enjoy these quotations. I assembled them—and as much as possible sought to group them—after reviewing many 100s of witticisms, jokes, puns, and assorted drollery on the subject. Finally, I selected those I felt were "choice," the very best of the lot, while at the same time endeavoring to exclude those that seemed rather tasteless, mean-spirited, or overly derisive. Still, I've little doubt that some readers will see me as failing in my attempts here..
"A dirty book is rarely dusty." ~ Anon.

"Literature is mostly about having sex and not much about having children; life is the other way around." ~ David Lodge

"Familiarity breeds contempt--and children." ~ Mark Twain

"It is not economical to go to bed early to save the candles if the result is twins." ~ Chinese Proverb

"Sex at age ninety is like trying to shoot pool with a rope." ~ George Burns

 "I'm at the age where food has taken the place of sex in my life. In fact, I've just had a mirror put over my kitchen table." ~ Rodney Dangerfield

"I've been around so long, I knew Doris Day before she was a virgin." ~ Groucho Marx

"My father told me all about the birds and the bees--the liar. I went steady with a woodpecker till I was twenty-one." ~ Bob Hope

"I know nothing about sex, because I was always married." ~ Zsa Zsa Gabor

"Anticipation makes the hard-on longer." ~ Itsby Stevintary

"The difference between light and hard is that you can sleep with a light on." ~ Anon

"A promiscuous person is a person who is getting more sex than you are." ~ Victor Lownes

"A nymphomaniac is someone who has more sex than you do." ~ Alfred Kinsey

"Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man." ~ Mignon McLaughlin

"A student undergoing a word-association test was asked why a snowstorm put him in mind of sex. He replied frankly: 'because everything does.'" ~ Honor Tracy

"Sex. In America an obsession. In other parts of the world a fact." ~ Marlene Dietrich

"Men are those creatures with two legs and eight hands." ~ Jayne Mansfield

"Chastity: The most unnatural of the sexual perversions." ~ Aldous Huxley

"Don't worry, it only seems kinky the first time. ~ Anon

 "Kinky is using a feather. Perverted is using the whole chicken." ~ Anon

"I'm all for bringing back the birch, but only between consenting adults." ~ Gore Vidal

"There is nothing wrong with going to bed with someone of your own sex. People should be very free with sex--they should draw the line at goats." ~ Elton John

"My girlfriend said to me in bed last night: 'you're a pervert.' I said, 'That's a big word for a girl of nine.'" ~ Emo Philips

"Sex on television can't hurt you, unless you fall off." ~ Anon

"He in a few minutes ravished this fair creature, or at least would have ravished her, if she had not, by a timely compliance, prevented him." ~ Henry Fielding

"I once knew a woman who offered her honor
So I honored her offer
And all night long I was on her and off her." ~ Anon

"Be naughty--save Santa a trip." ~ Anon

"I think I could fall madly in bed with you." ~ Anon

"When a man talks dirty to a woman, it's sexual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man, it's $3.95 a minute." ~ Anon

"The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs less." ~ Brendan Francis

 "Sex: the pleasure is momentary, the position ridiculous, and the expense damnable." ~ Lord Chesterfield

"Sex: the thing that takes up the least amount of time and causes the most amount of trouble." ~ John Barrymore

"When a guy goes to a hooker, he's not paying her for sex, he's paying her to leave." ~ Anon

"Vanity, revenge, loneliness, boredom, all apply: lust is one of the least of the reasons for promiscuity." ~ Mignon McLaughlin

"An intellectual is a person who's found one thing that's more interesting than sex." ~ Aldous Huxley

"There's nothing better than good sex. But bad sex? A peanut butter and jelly sandwich is better than bad sex." ~ Billy Joel

"Masturbation: the primary sexual activity of mankind. In the nineteenth century, it was a disease; in the twentieth, it's a cure." ~ Thomas Szasz

"We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation." ~ Lily Tomlin

"The good thing about masturbation is that you don't have to get dressed up for it." ~ Truman Capote

"How lucky we are that we can reach our genitals instead of that spot on our back that itches." ~ Flash Rosenberg

"Life in Lubbock, Texas taught me two things: One is that God loves you and you're going to burn in hell. The other is that sex is the most awful, filthy thing on earth, and you should save it for someone you love." ~ Butch Hancock

"Why should we take advice on sex from the pope? If he knows anything about it, he shouldn't! ~ George Bernard Shaw

"I thank God I was raised Catholic, so sex will always be dirty." ~ John Waters

"Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get the feeling that God is playing a practical joke?" ~Rita Rudner

"The only thing wrong with being an atheist is that there's nobody to talk to during an orgasm." ~Anon

"For women the best aphrodisiacs are words. The G-spot is in the ears. He who looks for it below there is wasting his time." ~ Isabel Allende

"I think men talk to women so they can sleep with them and women sleep with men so they can talk to them." ~ Jay McInerney

"Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place." ~ Billy Crystal

 "Desire is in men a hunger, in women only an appetite." ~ Mignon McLaughlin

"Among men, sex sometimes results in intimacy; among women, intimacy sometimes results in sex." ~ Barbara Cartland

"My wife is a sex object--every time I ask for sex, she objects." ~ Les Dawson

"What's the three words you never want to hear while making love? 'Honey, I'm home!'" ~ Ken Hammond

"You know that look women get when they want sex? . . . Me neither." ~ Steve Martin

"To succeed with the opposite sex, tell her you're impotent. She can't wait to disprove it." ~ Cary Grant

"When authorities warn you of the sinfulness of sex, there is an important lesson to be learned. Do not have sex with the authorities." ~ Matt Groening

"I regret to say that we of the FBI are powerless to act in cases of oral-genital intimacy unless it has in some way obstructed interstate commerce." ~ J. Edgar Hoover

"Obscenity is whatever gives the Judge an erection." ~ Anon

"Pornography: That which excites, whether from approval or disapproval." ~ Leonard Rossiter

"My reaction to porn films is as follows: After the first ten minutes, I want to go home and screw. After the first 20 minutes, I never want to screw again as long as I live." ~Erica Jong

"The difference between pornography and erotica is lighting." ~ Gloria Leonard

"What's the difference between art and pornography? . . . a government grant! ~ Peter Griffin

"Pornography is literature designed to be read with one hand." ~ Angela Lambert

"Pornography is in the loin of the beholder." ~ Charles Rembar

"Pornography is supposed to arouse sexual desires. If pornography is a crime, when will they arrest makers of perfume?" ~ Richard Fleischer

"There are three possible parts to a date, of which at least two must be offered: entertainment, food, and affection. It is customary to begin a series of dates with a great deal of entertainment, a moderate amount of food, and the merest suggestion of affection. As the amount of affection increases, the entertainment can be reduced proportionately. When the affection is the entertainment, we no longer call it dating. Under no circumstances can the food be omitted." ~ Judith Martin, in Miss Manners' Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behavior

Source: Pixabay Free Image

There's no doubt we all seem to spend a good deal of time talking about sex. Case in point: This list of 75 witty, poignant, and just plain famous sex quotes from.

Sex Quotes

wise quotes about sex

These saucy ladies tell it like it is.

There's nothing quite like watching an empowered woman walk onto a stage, flip caution the bird and spout a hilarious one-liner about sex.

Well look no further — we've compiled 15 of our favorite funny quotes about sex from famous ladies we absolutely ADORE:

1.

"So I'm licking jelly off my boyfriend and all of a sudden, I'm thinking, 'Oh my God, I'm turning into my mother.'" 
Sarah Silverman

2.

"It's work having a vagina. Guys don't think that it's work but it is. You think it shows up like that to the event? It doesn't. Every night it's like getting it ready for its first Quinceanera, believe me." 
Amy Schumer

3.

"As I get older, I just prefer to knit."
― Tracey Ullman

4.

"Good sex is like good bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand." 
Mae West

Read: The 23 BEST Donald Trump Memes Online That'll Make You Laugh Bigly!

5.

"You could put a blond wig on a hot-water heater and some dude would try to f**k it."
Tina Fey

6.

"We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation."
Lily Tomlin

7.

"If you wear a short enough skirt, the party will come to you."
Dorothy Parker

8.

"Usually I'm on top to keep the guy from escaping." 
Lisa Lampanelli

9.

"In my sex fantasy, nobody ever loves me for my mind."
Nora Ephron

10.

"I have a rule, and that is to never look at somebody's face while we're having sex; because, number one, what if I know the guy?" 
Laura Kightlinger

11.

"I think we can all agree that sleeping around is a great way to meet people." 
Chelsea Handler

Read: These 23 Relationship Memes Will Get You Through ANYTHING Together

12.

"The only time a woman has a true orgasm is when she's shopping." 
Joan Rivers

13.

"No woman gets an orgasm from shining the kitchen floor."
Betty Friedan

14.

"Women fake orgasms and men fake finances." 
Suze Orman

15.

"My boyfriend and I live together, which means we don't have sex—ever. Now that the milk is free, we've both become lactose intolerant." 
Margaret Cho

If you're searching for the best quotes and memes to share with the people you love (or just want to feel inspired yourself) ... look no further! From the sweetest love quotes, inspirational sayings, and hilarious relationship truths, we've got you covered.

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4057 quotes have been tagged as sex: Marilyn Monroe: 'It's not true that I had nothing on. I had the radio on.', Oscar Wilde: 'Everything in the world is.

wise quotes about sex
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