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Dirty christmas wishes

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Dirty christmas wishes
October 16, 2018 Anniversary Wishes for Wife 2 comments

Read on for our guide to writing Christmas greeting cards that your . “It's all fun and games until Santa checks the naughty list”; “Don't get your.

We all have come across some nice funny Christmas sayings that have been used over and over again. Here is a new list of unique saying that are not only funny but also worth sharing.
Oh am sorry, I didn’t notice you are an expert on how I should behave on Christmas! Please continue while I take the notes.

Am not rushing to get a new hair style for Christmas, I will get one new on the Christmas morning from my bedroom.

Anyone who tries to equate men to women, then she has never seen a man trying to wrap a Christmas gift.

Can I keep you forever? You are the perfect gift i would never like to lose for this Christmas.

Everybody gets so much information about Christmas such that they lose their common sense.

I wish Santa brings you the gift of never ending happiness this Christmas.



I hope you like my new Christmas cake recipe. They are called shut the hellupcakes, its Christmas.

Shhh… I just farted on Christmas.

Christmas has been canceled. Unfortunately you told Santa that you’ve been good. He died laughing.

The 100 Happy Birthday Wishes

The best Christmas is the one that wraps all the family to one another.

The 100 Christmas card sayings

I couldn’t afford a present this year’s Christmas, so I wrapped myself for you.

Christmas Vacation Quotes

Santa saw your Face-book Page. Now you are on the naughty list and won’t get anything.

Christmas Quotes

Christmas is love in action, act on it now.

Dear Santa, in 2015 all I ask for is a fat bank account and a slim body.

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Have a great day and enjoy in your life!

Laughter is the best medicine for this holiday, but if laugh with no reason then you need some medicine.

Let’s be naughty and save Santa the trip.

Last Christmas i gave you my heart, the following day you gave it away.

Christmas is not an external event, it’s an event born from your heart.

If a fat man puts you in a bag, don’t worry, I requested Santa to have you for Christmas.

One thing women doesn’t like to find on the Christmas morning in their stockings, is their husbands.

Why Christmas is just like any other day in office, I always find the big man come and take all the credit away in the evening.

Christmas Wishes

Every minute of the Christmas day is important. It one day at a time.


Christmas is not about just opening presents. It’s also about opening our hearts.

The reason why Santa is so happy this Christmas, it’s because he recognizes where all the loving ladies live.

The best thing about Christmas is that its compulsory and we all can’t speak.

Christmas is the time you get some homesick even when you at your house.

One stunning messes ever created, it’s the mess created on the Christmas day at the table. Never clear it.

Christmas is the time to kindle the blaze of generosity and the heat of charity.

Presents of kindness and love are the best gifts for a true merry.

At Christmas day every road leads me home.


It’s the Christmas in your heart that puts the Christmas on the table.

Instead of having an unusual behavior, this day is probably the most unique day in the calendar.

When i was a kid i was pleased with those who fit our legs with stockings on holiday but now we are ungrateful because our legs filled the stockings.

I wonder if we could put a jar of the Santa oneness and open it every month when we feel like.


From an entrepreneurial point of view it is advisable to invent Christmas if it not exist.

Merry Christmas quotes

I sometimes think that we insanely anticipate a lot from Christmas. It’s just a burden to the day itself.

Christmas is the time you purchase a year old gift with the New Year’s cash.

If Christmas wishes were chocolates and biscuits it would be an unforgettable celebration for Christmas

I saw how safely you stored the fireworks last holiday, you will snarl them this Christmas.

There is no other big mistake other than to wake on Christmas and pretend not to be a kid.


Keep your Christmas heart open all year round.

I never loved this Santa Claus thing because I knew that no white guy would come to my home from the darkness.

Though grown up now, I extremely get it hard to sleep on the Christmas Eve.

Which Christmas is most important to me? It’s the next Christmas.

The 100 Christmas Greetings

It hits you its Christmas when all kids start wearing new similar clothing.

I don’t want much this Christmas, I just want the person reading this to be loved.

May your fun be large in this 2015 Christmas holiday and your bills be small.

Let my love for you become the Christmas star, when you are in doubts let my feelings be the Christmas lights.

Hope you get the best gift of all, hope, peace and love.

The 60 Inspiring Christmas Card Ideas

Unforgettable is the moments that engages the world in the conspiracy of love.

I miss the Christmas wave of joy. It’s deeper than the ocean tide and comes only once a year.

Keeping Christmas is good, but sharing it with others it’s even better.

Love makes all things beautiful. Are you coated by the Christmas love?

You are special and unique, is your second name Christmas.

Your smile is contagious, please pass it to us and we all have a Christmas.

Peace on earth will come to stay when we live Christmas every day.

Santa will you come and join the merry? You won’t regret our feast.

Give some to the ones with less, and we will all become Santa’s someday.

Every-time we love, every-time we give, it’s Christmas my friend.

The only blind person at Christmas day is the only one who doesn’t share the love of the day to the other.

Christmas is the only day that holds the 364 days together.

All other days live to see the Christmas day love and envy by saying “when I grow up, I wanna be a Christmas day.”

Read more about beatiful Christmas birthday

Funny Christmas card sayings

My partner’s idea of getting into the festive spirit is to act like Scrooge.

Santa has had the right idea all along. Visiting family only once per year. Genius!

One of the advantages of not having children is never experiencing the dread on Christmas Eve when you realize all the packaging on the gifts you have bought for your children say Assembly required

One thing I love about Christmas is that you can make anyone you have wronged forget about the past with a present.

Christmas is great. Not only do I get a lot of gifts I want to keep. I also get plenty of gifts I can exchange. Saves me never having to buy anyone a present!

So Santa hides behind a large beard and has no income, but he can afford to give away billions of presents and flies to every city across the world every year. Are we sure Santa isn’t money laundering?

Christmas is here again. Let’s raise a cup of cheer. And make the men do the washing up.

T’is the time of year to buy this season’s gifts with next year’s money. It’s Christmas!

Pets, and their owners, like to expand over the Christmas vacation.

I left out gluten-free milk and cookies for Santa this year. They were still there when I woke up.

Christmas is the season where people seem to lose their sense of taste. Mature adults decide it’s best to celebrate by drinking a beverage made from cottage cheese and raw egg and call it nice.

What I don’t like about work Christmas parties is the possibility I might have to look for a job the next day after I have suitably embarrassed myself.

Mentally: I am totally read for Christmas. Financially? I’ll never be ready.

Have you all forgotten the true meaning of Christmas? The birth of Santa!

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Dirty Christmas Quotes

dirty christmas wishes

Naughty… Or nice?
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25 Funny Things to Write in a Christmas Card

dirty christmas wishes

Thank you to Wishes Poems for sharing their Christmas messages

Merry Christmas! ‘Tis the season to share heartfelt and funny Christmas card messages with friends, family and loved ones! Whether you are mailing a Christmas card, email, text message or e-card, it can often be tough to find the right words and to know what to write in a Christmas card. Ideally, Christmas greeting card messages come straight from the heart, but being such a busy season and a time when we need to write merry Christmas card messages to so many people, it can become quite a challenge to find the right merry Christmas words. But never fear, because we’ve got you covered! We recommend you look through the card messages below and choose something that just feels right, that gives words to how you already feel inside.

The Christmas greeting card messages below are grouped into three sections: 1) Christmas card messages for friends, 2) Christmas card messages for family, 3) funny Christmas card messages and 4) business Christmas card messages.

We hope you find the best Christmas greeting card messages for everyone you care about and that you enjoy the Christmas images too! Merry Christmas, happy holidays and happy New Year!

Christmas Card Messages for Friends

  • You light up my life like a Christmas tree. I am grateful to be your friend.
  • There’s no gift out there that I can give you to show you how much I care. You are my best friend in the world and I will carry you in my heart everywhere I go.
  • Your friendship and your love is the best Christmas gift that I’ve gotten. May the glow of the Christmas candles brighten your day.
  • May the spirit of Christmas bring you and your family hope, happiness and love. Merry Christmas and happy New Year!
  • Merry Christmas to the best friend ever. Santa knew just what I wanted when he brought you into my life.
  • It is friends like you that make this season so special and magical.
  • ‘Tis the season to be jolly, ‘tis the season to be thankful, ‘tis’ the season to celebrate. Merry Christmas!
  • Merry Christmas to you my dear, may you have a healthy, successful and joyful New Year.
  • May your Christmas be blessed with lots of love, fun, peace, joy and happiness.

Christmas Card Messages for Family

  • We may not be perfect, we may have our flaws, but one thing’s for certain, we all love Santa Claus!
  • Merry Christmas to the greatest parents. Thanks for filling my childhood full of joy, cheer and Christmas spirit.
  • Merry Christmas to my siblings. We may sometimes fight and disagree, but at least we get along under the Christmas tree!
  • This Christmas wish is sent to you, full of love and happiness, so that all your dreams may come true!
  • Merry Christmas, my child. Thanks for being the greatest gift of my life.
  • I wish Santa could wrap you up because all I want for Christmas is you here with me.
  • I don’t need anything from Santa because I was blessed with such a wonderful family. Merry Christmas!
  • Merry Christmas my love! All I want for Christmas and through the years is you my dear.

Funny Christmas Card Messages

  • Do you know why this Christmas card is so wonderful? Because it isn’t an email and it isn’t a text.
  • Money is scarce, times are hard, but I still managed to get you a Christmas card.
  • Merry drunk! I’m am so Christmas!
  • I had no idea what to write to a friend in a Christmas card, so I figured I’d try writing to you first!
  • Sorry to inform you but Christmas is cancelled this year. Apparently YOU told Santa you were good this year and he died laughing.
  • “One can never have enough socks,” said Dumbledore. “Another Christmas has come and gone and I didn’t get a single pair. People will insist on giving me books.” – J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone
  • Can I please have your picture so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?
  • I am permanently on the naughty list, and damn proud of it too!
  • “Aren’t we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas, the birth of Santa?” – Bart Simpson

Business Christmas Card Messages

  • Peace, love and harmony we wish to you and may love fill your home with blessings too. Happy Holidays!
  • Thank you so much for all that you’ve done this year. Enjoy your well deserved rest and time with family. Merry Christmas and a happy and healthy New Year!
  • Let the spirit of Christmas warm your home and fill your heart with joy and laughter. Merry Christmas and a happy New Year!
  • May the melody and spirit of the holidays fill your home with love and peace. I wish you all the best and happy New Year too!
  • Count your blessings, dance with joy, sing your Christmas carols and have a very Merry Christmas!
  • Christmas is sharing, celebrating, giving, caring, love, believing. Have a wonderful holiday!
  • May you share joyful memories, laughter and good cheer with your loved ones on this Christmas.
  • “At Christmas play and make good cheer, for Christmas comes but once a year.” – Thomas Tusser
  • “At Christmas, all roads lead home.” – Marjorie Holmes

For more, visit the complete collections of Christmas greetings and merry Christmas images


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We Wish You a Naughty Christmas book. Read 175 reviews from the world's largest community for readers. Naughty Or nice? 25 HOT Holiday stories by some.

Surprisingly Naughty Christmas Greeting Cards

dirty christmas wishes

love to watch my Christmas tree,
It blinks and sparkles bright.
So many colours of Christmas time,
It sure is a Christmas delight.

Julie Hebert

Christmas is forever,
Not for just one day.
For loving, sharing, giving,
Are not to put away.
Like bells and lights and tinsel,
in some box upon a shelf.
The good you do for others,
Is good you do yourself.

Norman W. Brooks

I've been waiting for Christmas
I've been waiting for Christmas
Santa's getting near.
Can't you hear the sleigh bells ringing?
Reindeer up so high
Can't you hear the children singing
As they watch the sky.


There’s More to Christmas
There’s more, much more to Christmas
Than candle-light and cheer;
It’s the spirit of sweet friendship
That brightens all the year;
It’s thoughtfulness and kindness,
It’s hope reborn again,
For peace, for understanding
And for goodwill to men!


I think you're fab-yule-lous!

Gifts of time and love are surely the basic ingredients of a truly merry Christmas.

Peg Bracken

Meet me under the mistletoe...

Christmas is a time for cherishing those who bring so many blessings to our lives. May your heart feel that love this Christmas and throughout the New Year ahead.

My idea of Christmas, whether old-fashioned or modern, is very simple: loving others.

Bob Hope

This Christmas I gave you my heart.

Christmas waves a magic wand over the world, and behold, everything is softer and more beautiful.

Norman Vincent Peale.

Your love is the best gift I could have asked for! Merry Christmas sweetheart!

If Christmas love and happiness were snowflakes, I'd wish you a blizzard's worth of them this year. Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

Hope this Christmas is your best ever

All I want for Christmas is you presents!

Have a super sparkly Christmas

With love at Christmas and ALL year

Warm wishes for a happy festive season!

WATCH THE VIDEO ON THEME: Adult Christmas Cards - Funny Christmas Cards - Dirty Santa Penis Greeting Card

To show your close friends admiration and wish them a joyous celebration, the messagesforchristmas provides a perfect assortment of the Naughty Christmas.

dirty christmas wishes
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