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Funny pearls of wisdom for marriage

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Funny pearls of wisdom for marriage
December 11, 2018 Anniversary Wishes For Parents 4 comments

The best and most comprehensive list of happy and positive marriage quotes on the web. your beliefs for the sake of greater understanding with your spouse, that's called wisdom. .. “Love is more than three words mumbled before bedtime .

I asked the question to my Facebook friends, “Those of you who have been married a long time– what pearls of wisdom would you want to share with engaged couples?”

Their answers were perfect.

Female Responses:

Love is a choice, not a feeling. You may not like each other every day, but you make a choice to love each other every day.

Don’t be so quick to give up! It won’t always be easy, but it’s worth working for!

Marriage is work. If you want it to work out, you have to work hard at it. You get out of marriage what you put in to it. Keep the lines of communication open at all times. Remember to “talk to” each other and not “at each other.” Have lots of fun!

Marriages go through seasons– some are great while others are hard. Enjoy the great seasons and hang on tight during the tough ones.

Take trips and travel just the two of you when you can. It’s not easy, but it’s always worth it.

Be kind one to another.

Marriage is not 50/50. Marriage is 100/100. You can’t come to a conclusion by being right; you come to a conclusion by coming to an understanding.

Discover each other’s love language and learn to speak it well! ( The Five Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts by Gary Chapman)

I love you. I was wrong . I’m sorry. Please forgive me.

Marriage is not a role play. Be yourself and root for each other.

Always love and respect one another and fight fair. When disagreements arise, don’t call names, rehash things that happened in the past or criticize them personally. Remember they are your best friend and should be treated that way.

Marriage isn’t static, it either gets better or worse, you choose each day which it will be. Also, marriage isn’t to make us happy, it’s to make us Holy.

Choose to forgive each day.

Just because you CAN say something doesn’t mean you SHOULD say something.

Hard work pays off even in a marriage.

When we got married we were advised to go to bed at the same time every night. Almost 10 years in we’re still doing this and it’s one of our favorite times of the day! Time to talk, pray, watch a funny YouTube video together…It’s not even about sex, it’s about connecting and ending the day together no matter what has happened in it.

Male Responses:

I always liked what Ruth Graham said – that her marriage was made of two sinners who forgave each other and never gave up on each other.

Soon to be wife – Please note: men are simple creatures. If you can remember this primary difference between the sexes – it puts most every annoying thing your husband will do in the proper perspective. He didn’t walk by that basket of unfolded laundry because he thought it was ‘your job’ to fold it – he walked by it because he’s a simpleton who was probably too busy contemplating whether or not he could drop a NASCAR engine into the minivan to even recognize that the basket of laundry was there in the first place.

Before we got married a husband told me being married was the best thing ever. A few minutes later his wife said it was the hardest thing ever. I thought these were two opposing views on the opposite ends of the spectrum only to find out later that they are really the same thing.

Find a couple 10-15 years older than you and have dinner once a month and just talk about life. Over time they will become your best friends even though they are older … simply because they give you perspective on marriage issues. Other than that, it’s pretty simple… he needs to TALK more and she needs to have more SEX!

Marriage is a covenant relationship, not a contract. Learn what that means (for help, see Tim Keller’s book The Meaning of Marriage) and keep Christ the mediator of that covenant between you and your spouse.

Best collection of '100+ Funny Marriage Advice & Quotes'. Find more at The most important words for successful marriage: 'I'll do the dishes.' Always strive to .

Sticky note bridal shower marriage advice

funny pearls of wisdom for marriage

Funny Words of Wisdom -
Funny Inspirational Quotes About Life


Funny words of wisdom and funny inspirational quotes about life spread a smile on our face while opening the doors straight to the heart. There is nothing like humor and laughter to take you right out-of-the-mind.

Stepping Out of the Mind with Laughter

"Humour is the only test of gravity, and gravity of humor; for a subject which will not bear raillery is suspicious, and a jest which will not bear serious examination is false wit."


Humor, laughter, a genuine smile - so simple, yet so powerful.

The power of humor comes from its ability to take us immediately out-of-the-mind. Try explaining a joke and you'll know this is true. When a joke is analyzed - once it's returned to the confines of the mind - the humor in it instantly dies.

The same is true for wisdom. Nothing quells wisdom faster than a quick, judgemental comment from the mind. Wisdom enters a mind that is open, a mind free of constraints and preconceived notions.

Humor and laughter bypass the usual refrains of the mind. With an open mind and an open heart, we are able to absorb new information and integrate new experiences. We change and marvel at how easily change has actually come our way.

Funny words of wisdom, or funny wisdom quotes, are an incredible gift.

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Funny Words of Wisdom - Funny Inspirational Quotes About Life

"The secret of life is to appreciate the pleasure of being terribly, terribly deceived."

~Oscar Wilde

"I often quote myself. It adds spice to my conversation."

~George Bernard Shaw

"Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired."

~Jules Renard

"My marriage had it's ups and downs like everyone's, but when it came down to it, I knew it was solid. I miss that sort of connection with someone."

~John Scalzi

"Where so many hours have been spent in convincing myself that I am right, is there not some reason to fear I may be wrong?"

~Jane Austen

"I might repeat to myself slowly and soothingly a list of beautiful quotations from minds profound - if I can only remember any of the damn things."

~Dorothy Parker

"I'm against a homogenized society, because I want the cream to rise."

~Robert Frost

"There are only two kinds of people who are really fascinating: people who know absolutely everything and people who know absolutely nothing."

~Oscar Wilde

"Martyrdom is the only way in which a man can become famous without ability."

~George Bernard Shaw

"The trouble with the rat-race is that, even if you win, you're still a rat."

~American comedienne Lily Tomlin

"What's the use of a good quotation if you can't change it?"

~Doctor Who

"Happiness is nothing more than good health and a bad memory."

~Albert Shweitzer

"I can resist anything but temptation."

~Oscar Wilde

"A lifetime of happiness! No man alive could bear it; it would be hell on earth."

~George Bernard Shaw

Funny Words of Wisdom - Funny Inspirational Quotes About Life

"To be stupid, selfish and have good health are three requirements for happiness, though if stupidity is lacking, all is lost."

~Gustave Flaubert

"To get back my youth I would do anything in the world, except exercise, get up early, or be respectable."

~Oscar Wilde

"Happiness is an imaginary condition, formerly attributed by the living to the dead, now usually attributed by adults to children, and by children to adults."

~Thomas Statz

"If nobody spoke unless they had something to say, the human race would very soon lose the use of speech."

~W. Somerset Maugham

"The only thing worse than being talked about, is not being talked about."

~Oscar Wilde

"Do you know what a pessimist is? A man who thinks everybody is as nasty as himself and hates them for it."

~George Bernard Shaw

"A jury consists of twelve people chosen to decide who has the better lawyer."

~Robert Frost

"Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city."

~George Burns

"Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months."

~Oscar Wilde

"Democracy is a device that ensures we shall be governed no better than we deserve."

~George Bernard Shaw

"If advertisers spent the same amount of money on improving their products as they do on advertising then they wouldn't have to advertise them."

~Will Rogers

"Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does."


“Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all others because you were born in it.”

~George Bernard Shaw

"Blessed are the flexible, for they shall not be bent out of shape."


Funny Words of Wisdom - Funny Inspirational Quotes About Life

"What is a cynic? A man who knows the price of everything and the value of nothing."

~Oscar Wilde

"The fact that a believer is happier than a skeptic is no more to the point than the fact that a drunken man is happier than a sober one."

~George Bernard Shaw

"I do not want people to be agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them."

~Jane Austen

"Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish."


"My problem lies in reconciling my gross habits with my net income."

~Errol Flyn

"Marriage is a great institution; but I am not ready for an institution yet."

~Mae West

"If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they'll kill you."

~Oscar Wilde

"It is a truth universally acknowledged that, a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife."

~Jane Austen

"My idea of an agreeable person is a person who agrees with me."

~Benjamin Disraeli

"One is tempted to define man as a rational animal who always loses his temper when he is called upon to act in accordance with the dictates of reason."

~Oscar Wilde

"Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children."

~George Bernard Shaw

"In three words I can sum up everything I have learned about life: it goes on."

~Robert Frost

Funny Words Of Wisdom - Funny Wisdom Quotes - Funny Life Lessons

"I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by."

~Douglas Adams

"There are many things that we would throw away if we were not afraid that others might pick them up."

~Oscar Wilde

"Always get married in the morning. That way, if it doesn't work out, you haven't wasted a whole day."

~Mickey Rooney

"I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life."

~Rita Rudner

"Whenever people agree with me I always feel I must be wrong."

~Oscar Wilde

"Don't be humble; you're not that great."

~Golda Meir

"When I meet a man I ask myself 'Is this the man I want my children to spend the weekends with?'"

~Rita Rudner

"I am an old man and have known many troubles. But most of them never happened."

~Mark Twain

"Scandal is gossip made tedious by morality."

~Oscar Wilde

"The surprising thing about young fools is how many survive to become old fools."

~Doug Larson

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Check out this insightful (and fun) new resource by Evolutionary Pathways for many more inspiring quotes and poems for stepping out of the mind and connecting with your warrior within...

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funny pearls of wisdom for marriage

Straight from Your Heart: Words of Congratulations for a Wedding

Wedding congratulatory message has to sound really special. Some quotes beautiful convey the emotions, along with wishing the couple on their special day.
Last Updated: Jan 19, 2018
Weddings are the time people shower the happy couple with lots of warm wishes as they embark upon a beautiful journey of togetherness and love. If you're invited to a wedding, it goes without saying that you should congratulate the couple on their special day, even if you're unable to attend the event due to prior commitments.
Words to Congratulate a Couple on their Wedding
While you are eager to wish them luck and send your heartfelt wishes, sometimes, it might get difficult to find the right words to say to the happy couple, or write the perfect message on the card. To make things simple, just imagine yourself in the place of the bride and groom, and try to think of words you'd like to hear from your near and dear ones. Your words of congratulations should, after all, come from the heart and this shouldn't be difficult, given your genuine affection for the couple.

Here are some verses and quotes that are filled with warm wishes for a couple that is getting married. You can write them on the card, or just recite them while raising a toast for the happy couple at the wedding party. Some of these are mushy and romantic; many of these are pearls of wisdom. Don't worry, there are some funny ones too! So take your pick and congratulate away!
Say it in Simple Words ...
♥ May every passing day bring more joy your way ... Congratulations on your wedding and wish you a wonderful life ahead!
♥ Wishing you a blissful life ahead that's just the right blend of love, understanding, fun, and romance. Congratulations on your wedding day!
♥ May the love in your hearts grow manifold and the beautiful bond that you share grow stronger with each passing day. Heartfelt congratulations to the perfect couple!
♥ Even when there are storms in the ocean of life, may your unwavering love for each other help you sail through. Congratulations on your wedding!
♥ This is a small note to congratulate you on your wedding. Here's wishing you a blissful life ahead, filled with love, happiness, and joy!!
♥ May your undying love for each other shine bright forever... Congratulations to the perfect couple on their wedding day!!
♥ May each moment to come be delightful, and may your life be a string of beautiful times spent together... Love and best wishes to a lovely couple!
♥ Your wedding is a special day, and here's wishing you a wonderful life ahead. May your love grow manifold with each passing moment... Congratulations!!
♥ Sending warm and heartfelt wishes your way... May every day of your new life together be as beautiful as your wedding day!! Congratulations!
♥ May the Lord shower His blessings on you, so that you get all the happiness in the world and live happily ever after... Congratulations on your wedding!!
♥ Congratulations to you on this special day, as you become united as husband and wife! Here's wishing you all the happiness in the world...
♥ I always felt that you both are made for each other, and I'm glad you've decided to be together for the rest of your lives. Hearty congratulations on your wedding! May your mutual love and happiness last for eternity...
♥ "When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible."
- Nora Ephron
♥ "We are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love."
- Dr. Seuss
♥ "There is no more lovely, friendly and charming relationship, communion or company than a good marriage."
- Martin Luther
♥ "Happy marriages begin when we marry the one we love, and they blossom when we love the one we married."
- Anonymous
♥ "Think not because you are now wed that all your courtship's at an end."
- Antonio Hurtado de Mendoza
♥ "Marriage is not a ritual or an end. It is a long, intricate, intimate dance together and nothing matters more than your own sense of balance and your choice of partner."
- Amy Bloom
♥ "A happy marriage is a long conversation that always seems too short."
- Andre Maurois
♥ "You were born together, and together you shall be for evermore.... but let there be spaces in your togetherness. And let the winds of the heavens dance between you."
- Khalil Gibran
♥ "Two such as you with such a master speed cannot be parted nor be swept away from one another once you are agreed that life is only life forevermore together wing to wing and oar to oar."
- Robert Frost
♥ The man or woman you really love will never grow old to you. Through the wrinkles of time, through the bowed frame of years, you will always see the dear face and feel the warm heart union of your eternal love.
- Alfred A. Montapert
And here are some funny ones...
♥ "Marriage is a lottery in which men stake their liberty and women their happiness."
- Madame de Rieux
♥ "A man in love is incomplete until he is married. Then he's finished."
- Zsa Zsa Gabor
♥ "By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you'll become happy, if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher."
- Socrates
♥ "Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway."
- Joey Adam
♥ "I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life."
- Rita Rudner
♥ "To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the wedding cup, whenever you're wrong, admit it; whenever you're right, shut up."
- Ogden Nash
Say it With a Poetic Verse ...
♥ Here's wishing you
On this special day,
May your mutual love never cease
Come what may...
Congratulations on your wedding!! ♥ ♥
♥ Your wedding day is a special time
To celebrate the love you feel,
May each one of your cherished wishes
Turn out to be real... Congratulations!! ♥ ♥
♥ Congratulations to you on your wedding day -
A day of happiness and joy,
May every moment of your new life together
Usher in reasons to celebrate and enjoy!! ♥ ♥
♥ May the Lord shower His blessings
On both of you today...
May your every wish come true,
May your new life be perfect in every way...
Congratulations on your wedding!! ♥ ♥
♥ On the joyous day of your wedding,
As you both say, "I do",
May the Lord shower His blessings on you,
And may your love last a lifetime through...
Congratulations on your wedding!! ♥ ♥
♥ May the love and closeness that you share
Grow manifold with time...
I'm glad that you've found true love that's rare,
May the heavens shower blessings on this relationship sublime...
Congratulations and have a magical wedding day!! ♥ ♥
♥ Now you will feel no rain, for each of you will be the shelter for each other.
Now you will feel no cold, for each of you will be the warmth for the other.
Now you are two persons, but there is only one life before.
Go now to your dwelling to enter into the days of your life together.
And may your days be good and long upon the earth.
-Apache Blessing ♥ ♥
♥ A soul mate is someone who has locks that fit our keys, and keys to fit our locks.
When we feel safe enough to open the locks, our truest selves step out and we can be completely and honestly who we are;
we can be loved for who we are and not for who we're pretending to be.
Each unveils the best part of the other.
No matter what else goes wrong around us, with that one person we're safe in our own paradise.
Our soul mate is someone who shares our deepest longings, our sense of direction.
When we're two balloons, and together our direction is up, chances are we've found the right person.
Our soul mate is the one who makes life "come to life".
- by Richard Bach ♥ ♥
♥ Love is patient, Love is kind,
It does not envy, it does not boast,
It is not proud, it is not rude,
It is not self-seeking,
It is not easily angered,
It keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil,
but rejoices with the truth.
Love always protects, always trusts,
always hopes, always perseveres.
Love bears all things, believes all things,
hopes all things, endures all things.
Love never ends.
Lover never fails.
- (The Bible 1 Corinthians 13:4-8) ♥ ♥
♥ May the road rise to meet you,
May the wind be always at your back.
May the sun shine warm upon your face,
The rains fall soft upon your fields.
And until we meet again,
May God hold you in the palm of his hand.
May God be with you and bless you;
May you see your children's children.
May you be poor in misfortune,

Rich in blessings,
May you know nothing but happiness
From this day forward.
May the road rise to meet you
May the wind be always at your back
May the warm rays of sun fall upon your home
And may the hand of a friend always be near.
May green be the grass you walk on,

May blue be the skies above you,
May pure be the joys that surround you,
May true be the hearts that love you.
- Irish Blessing ♥ ♥
So, you see that finding the right words is not that difficult after all! You can use your creativity to tweak any of the wordings that you've seen so far, to create something that best expresses your warm regards for the couple. You can even include a few of them in your speech as you raise a toast to the couple on their wedding day. Just say it from the heart and the couple would cherish your message of congratulation even for a long time after the wedding day.

Have you ever noticed that everyone seems to have marriage advice for Diane advised newlyweds to, “Keep your sense of humor and remember that no-one.

The 12 funniest quotes about marriage

funny pearls of wisdom for marriage

The secret to writing an amazing wedding speech? Seeking out a few perfect maid of honor quotes that sum up just how beautiful the couple's union is. Just last month, I was maid of honor in my friend's wedding, and had the task of figuring out what to say during my maid of honor speech about a friend who means so much to me. As anyone who has pondered how to write a maid of honor speech knows, it's incredibly difficult to keep a speech short and sweet when a friendship encompasses so much — two to three minutes, really? Even though I'm a wedding coordinator and know that long speeches can go downhill fast, it was super challenging to get my speech within my own two-to-three minute maid of honor speech guidelines.

My friend, however, is a gal who loves inspiring quotes, so I decided to base my whole speech around three short quotes that spoke to the wonderful person she is, how much her new husband loves her, and their marriage together. It was great having three quotes in my maid of honor speech to focus on, because it helped me figure out what each part of the speech would be about — and it helped me keep it short.

Another great friend of mine was married last year, and she is also a gal who loves inspiring quotes about love. When dating before their marriage, she and her husband would collect quotes about love and relationships for one another (how sweet!). For their wedding, they decided to share many of the quotes with their wedding guests by decorating their centerpiece vases with them — and many of the quotes they collected are included here.

So between these two weddings, I've come to be a huge fan of love quotes being incorporated throughout the wedding day. They never get old. Everyone loves them. And quotes add a meaningful touch to wedding receptions just as well as they do to wedding ceremonies — though quotations for wedding ceremonies seem to be much more popular.

Whether the bride is your sister, your best friend, or someone you just met (it happens, right?), here are 25 great quotes for your maid of honor speech.

1. "Love is a symbol of eternity. It wipes out all sense of time, destroying all memory of a beginning and all fear of an end." — Author Unknown

2. "Success in marriage does not come merely through finding the right mate, but through being the right mate." — Barnett R. Brickner

3. "After the chills and fever of love, how nice is the 98.6 degrees of marriage! " — Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960

4. "It was only long after the ceremony that we learned why we got married in the first place." — Lois Wyse

5. "Don't marry the person you think you can live with; marry only the individual you think you can't live without." — James C. Dobson

6. "We have the greatest pre-nuptial agreement in the world. It's called love." — Gene Perret

7. "Love seems the swiftest but it is the slowest of all growths. No man or woman really knows what perfect love is until they have been married a quarter of a century." — Mark Twain

8. "Here's to matrimony, the high sea for which no compass has yet been invented!" — Heinrich Heine

9. "It takes a loose rein to keep a marriage tight." — John Stevenson

10. "Marriage is not a ritual or an end. It is a long, intricate, intimate dance together and nothing matters more than your own sense of balance and your choice of partner." — Amy Bloom

11. "The real act of marriage takes place in the heart, not in the ballroom or church or synagogue. It's a choice you make not just on your wedding day, but over and over again and that choice is reflected in the way you treat your husband or wife." — Barbara De Angelis

12. "A good marriage is one which allows for change and growth in the individuals and in the way they express their love." — Pearl S. Buck

13. "The more you invest in a marriage, the more valuable it becomes." — Amy Grant

14. "There is no remedy for love but to love more." — Henry David Thoreau

15. "If only you could love enough you would be the happiest and most powerful being in the world." — Emmet Fox

16. "The moment you have in your heart this extraordinary thing called love and feel the depth, the delight, the ecstasy of it, you will discover that for you the world is transformed." — J. Krishnamurti

17. "It is the things in common that make relationships enjoyable, but it is the little differences that make them interesting." — Todd Ruthman

18. "Love is a force more formidable than any other. It is invisible — it cannot be seen or measured, yet it is powerful enough to transform you in a moment, and offer you more joy than any material possession could." — Barbara De Angelis

19. "The greatest thing you'll ever learn is to love and be loved in return." — Natalie Cole

20. "The most wonderful of all things in life, I believe, is the discovery of another human being with whom one's relationship has a glowing depth, beauty and joy as the years increase. This inner progressiveness of love between two human beings is a most marvelous thing, it cannot be found by looking for it or by passionately wishing for it. It is a sort of Divine accident." — Sir Hugh Seymour Walpole

21. "Let the world stop turning, let the sun stop burning,Let them tell me love's not worth going through.If it all falls apart, I will know deep in my heart,The only dream that mattered had come true...In this life I was loved by you." — Bette Midler

22. "A man travels the world over in search of what he needs, and returns home to find it." — George Moore

23. "A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person." — Mignon McLaughlin

24. "To keep the fire burning brightly there's one easy rule: Keep the two logs together, near enough to keep each other warm and far enough apart — about a finger's breadth — for breathing room. Good fire, good marriage, same rule." — Marnie Reed Crowell

25. "Everyone has two choices. We're either full of love... or full of fear." — Albert Einstein

Want more of Bustle's Sex and Relationships coverage? Check out our new podcast,I Want It That Way, which delves into the difficult and downright dirty parts of a relationship, and find more on our Soundcloud page.

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WATCH THE VIDEO ON THEME: Marriage comedy because sometimes marriage is seriously funny

More Funny Marriage & Relationship Quotes. More Funny Marriage So to you all here is a sequel of marriage & relationship quotes. Enjoy! “Wives are young men's . Very funny. Worth the read. Thanks for sharing with us pearls of wisdom.

funny pearls of wisdom for marriage
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